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[Tue, Feb 5th, 2008 @ 8:54pm] |
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February 5, 2008
Edria was a puzzle that I was having issues trying to solve. Every ounce of Darkling in me screamed that she was only being nice to me because she was a Fairest, a Flowering Fairest at that. It was all a guise, a trick of some sort to get what she wanted out of me. Wasn’t that the usual mode of operations for the Fairest?
But if this was some sort of trick, why would she have let me see her so weak? Why would she have shared with me the knowledge of how this whole thing with Kalen and Gaius was killing her? Was that a trick, too? It seemed real enough. And if she had been Spring Court, I so would have kicked her while she was “down” and told her to get a new bag of tricks. It was such a “Spring” thing to do, to pretend to be helpless and tie up someone’s emotions to get them to do what the Spring Farie-fuck wanted you to do.
I didn’t get that sense from Edria, though. It was funny. I never got that manipulative sense from her.
Either she was just that good, or she knew me far more than even I knew me.
And even then, if she was playing some elaborate game with me, why give me the companion?
As if on queue, Flame crawled down from the braids of my hair, hanging upside down from one of them and bouncing lightly against my cheek. It turned its gecko head to the side, wings slowly flexing, as he regarded me.
“What?” I snapped.
I swear to god the little winged gecko shrugged its black and red shoulders at me. We were still trying to get a sense of each other, Flame and I. There was something off yet, something not quite true as companion to each other. But we were getting closer to being that. And the closer I got to the little guy, the more confused I got about those around me.
Like that whole Gaius/Kalen/Edria thing.
What the hell did they want with that whole “love” thing in the first place? Did they somehow forget what the fuck we all were? We didn’t have the luxury of love, of settling down someplace and having two point five kids and a white picket fence. We were runaway slaves! If we even remotely cared about someone, we formed a motley and prayed that one of us didn’t get eaten by the hedge… or worse.
Nowhere in that agreement did the word “love” ever surface. The whole notion of love just served to piss me off. Love made you do stupid things that got you killed… or worse. Love made you rescue little white kittens from the Hedge just so you could see one of your Motley smile. Love made you swear oaths to a place like Som’I’seely when you knew you were just shooting yourself in your favorite foot while doing it.
Love sucked. Sucked like Christmas. What a crock.
Flame laughed, a little hissing/snapping sound, as if he had read my mind. I narrowed my eyes at the little guy and lifted my left hand, thumb depressing my index finger. His wings moved like bits of living fire and he deftly floated out of my way before I could flick him with my finger. Laughing again, he disappeared back into my hair.
Great, even my companion mocked me. I went back to manning the counter of my shop, watching Trouble try to talk Dog out of his broom once again. Every so often, I heard Gwyn giggling and the sound of a purring cat. Then I heard Storm trying to push Goat out of the way, so he could do… whatever it was that he did.
I was smirking before I realized I was doing it. Okay, I loved my Motley and my regular customers. Sue me. If one of them came up missing… I dunno. Maybe I would go on. Maybe I would be as crushed as Edria seemed to be. Was loosing a loved one to someone else like loosing them physically?
For once, that was a question I really didn’t want to know the answer to.
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| A rant on the holidays... |
[Tue, Dec 18th, 2007 @ 10:28pm] |
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music |
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Trouble... Pink |
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Last winter I was called "the angriest darkling," and guess what? I'm angry! How dare anyone suggest I have no right to feel what I feel? If you're even barely engaged in this world, anger manifests itself constantly (assuming you're not medicated, which I am not, dammit to hell!).
And let's be totally honest here, anger does a lot of good, like:
1. It clenches my stomach muscles into a tight knot so I can look good with my shirt tucked in.
2. It adds hours and hours of productivity by keeping me awake until five o'clock in the morning.
3. It's a constant reminder that I own too many guns and don't have enough targets to shoot at.
4. It makes golf an opportunity to practice my javelin toss.
5. It fills me with joy every time Lewis Black is on The Daily Show.
6. It adds sizzle to caffeine.
7. It whispers to me that I'm fine, that I don't need to slow down, and that my cardiologist is an idiot.
8. It keeps people at a healthy distance during flu season (and the rest of the year as well).
Okay, the sun's coming up, I'm gonna try and get some sleep.
((ooc: shamelessly stolen from a Chuck Lorre vanity card. I do not own this, but oh, god, did it make me laugh till I cried!))
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| Background for Changeling: The Lost |
[Sat, Sep 8th, 2007 @ 5:40pm] |
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mood |
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Tiimeline background:
* 1900—Isadora Belisarius is born in Sicily.
* 1904—Immigrated with her parents to New York.
* 1917—Attended “Blah” college in New York for Medicine, where she met Allen Black (played by Wesley McKeown) and David Flannery (NPC for now—Name changeable upon finding someone to play the character).
* 1919 “David Flannery” vanishes without a trace, leaving Allen and Isa to search for him for over a year.
* 1921 Allen graduates with degree in ____________________.
* 1921—Married Allen Black.
* 1923—Graduated with medical doctorate
* 1923—Gave birth to a daughter named Emily.
* 1925—Allen and Isa are in a car accident wherein their daughter dies. They watch their beloved child turn into a bundle of twigs and mud before vanishing from sight. Given the clues found during David’s disappearance, Allen and Isa give up their careers and begin researching the supernatural.
* 1925-1929—Allen and Isa become supernatural experts by this time, following clues to all kinds of monsters (al la Cthulu-style).
* 1929—Allen and Isa watch what appear to be identical twins fighting in an alley in Massachusetts. One is screaming the other stole his life. One is cut and bleeds blood, the other is cut and doesn’t bleed at all. Allen and Isa open fire on the “unbleeding twin.” It runs off and they give chase, heedless of the “bleeding twin’s” screams of warning, charge headlong into the alley and into the Hedge. They are separated in the Thorns. Isa is found by a goblin slaver and put on the auction block (Ties for Holly and Rhonda’s characters.)
* 1929—Isa is purchased by a Fae that bids outstandingly more than any other Fae for her, citing breech of contract by one of Isa’s ancestors as her right to purchase. No other Fae would bid on her after that fact.
* In the Hedge—Isa’s identity is stripped from her physically, emotionally and mentally. She is told only that “she is paying for _HIS_ mistake” and nothing else. She spends time as an androgynous statue in a garden, and later as the Mistress’s “dressing doll.” Her Keeper would “sculpt” Isa to look like she wished for the evening, and then copy her “doll” onto her own appearance. Other times, Isa was used as a lady’s maid while other changelings served as a “dressing doll.”
* In the Hedge—Isa, while acting as a lady’s maid, encounters (Karou’s character) at one of the many gladiatorial games. They sit and chat a bit while their Keepers bet on the matches.
* In the Hedge—Isa is determined to find her husband and escape. On more than one occasion, she is hunted down and drug back by (JD’s character and later Spider’s character). So many attempts to run through the Thorns begin to wear down Isa’s soul. Each trip into the Thorns rips away yet another piece of her memory until she is uncertain why she keeps trying to run away. She knows only that she _has_ to try. Eventually most of her long term memories are stripped away, caught on the Thorns. She builds herself on the memories she makes within the Hedge, taking on the name of Mercury (for the now metallic sheen of her skin as well as for her swiftness.
* In the Hedge—Isa’s insolence is harshly rewarded with more time as an androgynous statue. Eventually, her Keeper grows tired of her and uses her as a bet on several gladiatorial games.
* In the Hedge—Isa is traded to (ooc Jake’s character)’s keeper, who noted her keen eye when it came to wounds suffered by his gladiators. She is used as a medic.
* In the Hedge—Isa is paired up with (ooc Lana’s character) to heal those wounded in games or just wounded in general by their Keepers. Isa shares knowledge of scientific medicine while Edria shares knowledge of herbal remedies.
* In the Hedge—Isa is traded later to (ooc John’s character)’s keeper, where she meets him and strikes up an interesting sort of friendship.
* In the Hedge—Isa begins to realize the value of being traded so often between so many Keepers with such regularity. She starts to encourage punishments in order to keep her focused and traded, in order to pass messages between different Changelings who have different Keepers. This, along with unreasonable rage—for which she cannot now remember the cause of—becomes her focus and allows her to keep her clarity. She even goes far enough to establish ties with different Goblin raiding crews.
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Tiesha)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Anie)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Jay)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Anthony)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Juliet?)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Brit)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Char)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Troy)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Dave)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Greg)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Jim?)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Jilly?)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Mir)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Dennis)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Mark)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Sean M.)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Chris B.)
* In the Hedge—(ooc ties with Rachel M?)
* In the Hedge—Isa eventually learns that her Keeper wants her back and has a
new obsession—that of recreating the Greek Muses. (ooc ties for Steph Williams and Rachel Frye and the rest of the Sisters Nine) This has something to do with the mysterious “him” that her Keeper often rages about.
* 2000ish—Isa escapes the Hedge—finally—with the help of Edria and Gaius. She drags Gwyn and Dog with her, refusing to leave them behind.
* 2000ish—Isa is separated from the rest of the group during the escape. She eventually finds her own way out, and along the way finds an old journal that she does not remember, but knows it’s important to her. It is the story of a man named “Allen” and his many attempts to “get back to his own time and place.”
* 2000ish—Isa emerges from the Thorns in Tampa, Florida. She has no memory of who she is/was. She has only the journal she found and the remains of a gypsy garb on her body. She finds a trashed paperback on the street and takes the first name she sees in it, that of Jandori.
* 2000ish—Jandori hooks up again with Storm, Dog, and Gwyn. Through maneuvering and theft, they gain enough money to start surviving. Storm provides information about the modern time to the rest that have know knowledge of it.
* 2000ish—Jandori hooks back up with (Dennis’s character) and, realizing how low his Clarity had become, takes over leadership of The White Stag group.
*2004ish—Jandori and crew form a Motley called “The Broken.” They open a pawnshop together and being dealing in information, goblin fruits, tokens, new IDs for newly escaped Lings, as well as mundane items. The group gains a reputation for neutrality and honest dealings.
* 2005—Jandori connects with a guild called “The Innkeepers” and opens a B&B.
* Outside the Hedge—(ooc ties with Williams?)
* Outside the Hedge—(ooc ties with Rob W.)
* Outside the Hedge—(ooc ties with Josh?)
* Outside the Hedge—(ooc ties with George C.)
* Outside the Hedge—(ooc ties with Matt B?)
* Outside the Hedge-(ooc ties with Justin D?)
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| Playlists... |
[Wed, Jul 11th, 2007 @ 12:34am] |
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mood |
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amused |
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Playlist for Jandori:
1. Fable - Robert Miles
2. Missing You (Bushwacka Layo Remix) - Finley Quaye and William Orbit
3. Gypsies, Tramps, and Thieves – Cher
4. Walk the Walk – Poe
5. Carry On Dancing – Savage Garden
6. Polaroid Millennium – Superior
7. Stay – Shakespeare’s Sister
8. Hazy Shade of Winter – The Bangles
9. Acrobat – U2
10. Trouble – Pink
11. Get Stoned – Hinder
12. Cradle of Love – Billy Idol
13. Kiss Me Deadly – Lita Ford
14. Edge of a Broken Heart – Vixen
15. Ugly Side – Blue October
16. Creep – Radiohead
17. Never Too Late – Three Days Grace
18. Innocent – Avril LaVigne
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ladydreamdancer's journal
Alias: The Dream Dancer